Xi Jinping goes on choreographed 'visit' to Wuhan
Xi Jinping goes on choreographed "visit" to Wuhan

WUHAN, CHINA — With cases of the Co-Sniffles-19 supposedly declining in fantastic China, Chinese dictator Xi Jinping has pumped the propaganda machine into overdrive.

In a highly choreographed visit to the epicenter of the world's latest troubles, emperor Xi made his first visit to Wuhan since the Chinese viral outbreak started more than two months ago.

According to China's fake news outlet Xinhua, Xi "went straight to Huoshenshan Hospital" after touching down in Wuhan were he "visited patients" and "sent regards" to medical workers, "encouraging them to firm up confidence in defeating the epidemic." Actually...Xi didn't have the gonads to see them in person.

He talked to them over video in a conference room that was nowhere near the actual makeshift hospitals.

What a brave leader.

Xi then toured a Wuhan neighborhood with quarantined residents who have been stuck inside for weeks.

But because last week Wuhan residents heckled Vice Premier Sun Chunlan while she was visiting one neighborhood, police were deployed in people's apartments so that Xi wouldn't be welcomed by any shouting residents.

China claims new cases of Chinese people being infected with the Wuhan virus have plummeted.

And since China has been nothing but transparent and open about all the actual cases and deaths the world can now breathe a big sigh of relief—right?